Monday, December 1, 2008


As December 4th approaches, the day of checking Joel in the hospital, I read this from another's journey of grieving and it melted my heart.....

In everything ye are enriched by Him." (1 Cor. 1:5)

"O Mother! my heart breaks with your heart when your cradle is empty. But shall I call back the child? Nay; sooner pluck a star out of heaven than call back that child to this wintry blast.

Your child is in a spring-land. [He] is in a summer-world. [He] is with God. You have given [him] back to Him who lent [him] to you.

Now, the giving back is very hard. But you can not give back to God all that you received with your child. You can not give back to God those springs of new and deeper affection which were awakened by the coming of this little one. You can not give back to God the experiences which you have had in dwelling with your darling.

You are better, you are riper, you are richer, even in this hour of bereavement, than you were. God gave, and He has not taken away except in outward form. He holds, He keeps, He watches, He loves. You shall have again that which you have given back to Him only outwardly.

Meanwhile the key is in your hand, and it is not a black iron key; it is a golden key of faith, of hope, and of love. This little child has taught you to follow [him]. There will not be a sunrise or a sunset when you will not in imagination go through the gate of heaven after [him]. There is no door so fast that a mother's love and a father's love will not open it, and follow a beloved child. And so, by [his] ministration, this child will guide you a thousand times into a realization of the great spirit-land, and into a faith of the invisible, which will make you as much larger as it makes you less dependent on the body, and more rich in the fruitage of the spirit."
(Mrs. Charles Cowman, "Consolation")

To think that I am enriched in everything that the Lord does, that means even in the life and death of Joel, to believe this sometimes is hard, but I must...........



kjvbaptist said...

"To think that I am enriched in everything that the Lord does, that means even in the life and death of Joel, to believe this sometimes is hard, but I must.........."

i wouldn't say MUST, but as a true believer, you GET to believe it. He has given you hope to have the privilege to believe in His promises. False religions force a MUST on the people. Jesus Christ allows us to actual GET to believe Him. God Bless, Paul and Leah

Emma and Mommy said...

I have been thinking of you so much lately as the time draws nearer to some of annivesaries of those unfortunate days.

I can only imagine the pain and heartache you feel for your little Joel and how you long to hold him once more. But I do know you see teh goodness of it all, that he is with the Lord our God and he is no longer suffering and is living in eternal peace and happiness and awaits you all there.

I have always admired you, and how through it all you have clung to God, not pushed him a way like even some of the strongest believers have done when they have lost a child or loved one. It often reminds me of one of the most beautiful bible quotes.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."
Psalm 91:1-2

Hugs to you and thank you so much for sharing your life here in the blog, its been one of the greatest honors of my life to read about Joel and get to know your family through your words.

Emma and Mommy said...

You are very welcome. I might not always have the right choice of words, or know exactly how you are feeling, but please know I am always here for you. Your family is such a blessing to me.

Bob and Cindy Cole said...

I love Mrs. Charles Cowman's writings. She is the editor of Streams In The Desert. It is a wonderful devotional. I am so proud of you Cindy. I know God is pleased that you continually seek Him and fight the flesh of wanting to give into despair. I can just imagine Joel saying, "Hang on Mommy, you are almost done!" Thank you Jesus that we will all someday be "all done".