Monday, October 27, 2008


I am having to review truths, my emotions are telling me one thing.....the month of Nov. is at hand, when we started trying to figure out why all the fevers, Joel was beginning to become more weary in strength and he was starting to have pains.....I am reviewing in my mind so that it can impact my heart, "God the good Creator of all things, in His infinite power and wisdom doth uphold, direct, dispose, and govern all creatures and things, from the greatest even to the least, by His most wise and holy providence, to the end for the which they were created, according unto His infallible foreknowledge, and by the free and immutable counsel of His own will; to the praise of the glory of His wisdom, power, justice, infinite goodness, and mercy. Although in relation to the foreknowledge and decree of God, the first cause, all things come to pass immutably and infallibly; so that there is not anything befalls any by chance, or without His providence; yet by the same providence He ordereth them to fall out, according to the nature of second causes, either necessarily, freely, or contingently. (1689 Confession of Faith) It has befallen us according as He ordaineth! Today it "feels" like a day that he was here!!!

Most of the chickens have been picked up, the last of the folks are coming out here shortly and we'll have that wrapped up! It's good to have all the meat in the freezer. I guess Micah is going to get the wood stove going here in a little bit, its suppose to be 29 her tonight. I am not a cold weather person. It does not bother the children, they are out there right now playing like normal, even Mercy! Caleb stayed her today, they are trying to finish up Pendragon music, by Thursday! Terry, Daniel and Elijah are braving the cold. They are working on a house that involves extremely dangerous heights, some places 30 feet, and trying to build walk boards and rails, so if the Lord brings them to your mind, pray for safety! Terry's folks are coming for the weekend, so starting to make preparations for company.

Again, I am trying to "think" on things that are true, but I can not seem to get my hear to follow! My heart wants to sit and sulk and wish....its an exercise to make myself not get sad at God. I know it has to do with this season and November and the following months ahead, our last of everything with Joel is just so big in my mind right now. I know we are working on two years but the memories are so sharp as to this particular time. I know so many still pray for me and I am grateful, keep it up as the Lord brings it to mind.

Happy Monday!!! (that picture was Oct. 24, 2006)



Bob and Cindy Cole said...

It is the holidays coming up too, Cindy, that make you sad. The holidays always make me miss my loved ones more because those were special family times that we really miss with them.


Lockwoods said...

Oh Cindy, I have been praying for you often in the past several days...every since precious Joel's/Josiah's birthday really.
I have never lost a 3 year old, and just imagining it makes my heart ache and brings tears to my eyes. I wouldn't at all think that after 2 years those memories/special times/seasons would be faded.
Though I can't truly understand having never been there, I do "understand" what you are saying.
And yes, I would imagine even if Joel hadn't been sick these months of the year, they would still be difficult as the holiday season always brings up so many memories of loved ones/home.
Yes, there are so many times our heads know what our hearts do not feel. But just keep doing what you are doing....relying on Him and the TRUTH of His precious, unchanging, never failing Word! You will never regret doing so.
Praying His strength, grace, peace, comfort, love and joy are poured out abundantly upon your heart during the days ahead.
love and prayers,