We made it back from the goat show. Bethany did not do great but she was at least noticed by the judge, and she got 8th out of 25 in her class. Andrew did not place, but he did a great job and his goat showed well. We only showed two this time as Bethany has to get some more papers sent in, so by the next shows we will have more possibilities. It is just great to be together as a family although when these adventures come I tend to "sigh" alot. Just seeing Josiah bounce around in his little "cowhat" and boots, knowing Joel would LOVE all that was going on causes somewhat of a pain that strikes to the wound that is there. I want to get to the place of looking at Josiah and be grateful and I am to a point I guess, but I also think about "whats not." I need a continious flow of gratefulness springing up instead of little "spurts." I have never journeyed this path so maybe it has to do with time....I do not know. I just keep asking the Lord for his mercy because I do not know if I am at the place I should be in all this. I find myself thinking "what's not" in other areas too, so I think I need to learn to be grateful. I wonder why I (we) look at so much of the what's not, the not done, and the wished I had, instead of the wonderful blessings, the joy of being together, the provisions that we DO have, the blessings that are too numerous to name, and be grateful for the 3 years 4 months and 10 days with Joel and to not dwell on the 30, 40 ,50 years I wish I could have had with Joel. O Lord help my heart to become more pleasing to you instead of pleasing myself!!! I read a scripture in Ps. 65:13 The pastures are clothed with flocks, the valleys also are covered with corn; they shout for joy, they also sing. That verse right there is what is happening in front of me and I need to do what it says, shout for joy and sing and push this "what's not" attitude out!!
We made it back in time for Terry to work in the garden. Our ground has corn covered beneath its surface just today....Terry and his helpers got it in. Eight 50 foot rows. Terry calculated around 900 ears IF THE LORD IS WILLING! We can plant but it is the Lord to give the increase. It is wonderful to be able to just go out and pick stuff for a fresh salad.
We got a few more things done today..Elijah had to go get some more hay, cleaned baby chicks pen out and the van. Getting everthing ready for church meeting tomorrow, and I think someone is coming to get a puppy here in a little while. We sold one yesterday. Anybody need one? (Interesting... these two people came after I prayed for the puppies to sell, oops I forgot to ask the Lord to sell them!!) And in the midst of all the work we have two fellas that are getting rid of our wasps, Joshua and Jeremiah are dropping them one by one with their BB guns. Sounds pretty dangerous!!
Our guest Danielle will be heading back to her home tomorrow after church. It has been great to have her here. She fits in like one of the rest and helps and serves. Now we are gearing up for another visit, from grandparents, my dad and his wife Shirley(both of their spouses have battled cancer and are now with the Lord) are coming on Tuesday. We will have Monday to revamp and clean up around here. The children LOVE to be with their "Paps." I am so thankful he comes so often as it is so hard for us to travel, with all the animals and people:)
Enjoy your day with your family tomorrow and may the Lord give us hearts to worship in spirit and truth.
I love you Joel, and miss you!!!
Cindy
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