Monday, April 14, 2008

Nevertheless....*(Donut recipe added)*

And he said, Abba, Father, all things are possible unto thee:take away this cup from me: nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt. Mark 14:36. This is one of the most challenging verses to me, having a hope, and expection that all is possible and then having a rest, trust, confidence all in the same breath. I am not there yet, but I can tell in my spirit I am growing and learning, because I can actually pray that now. Before Joel went to the Lord, I had a hope that God could do the impossible, yet it was almost a demanding prayer, a pleading that he do the impossible. I could not pray "nevertheless not what I will, but what thou wilt" because I wanted Joel, I wanted him to play with Siah, I wanted him to be in our family and grow up with all his siblings, I had dreams, plans. I did not want the Lord to take him. Now as we have walked in the valley of death and are on the other side, that scripture takes a whole new meaning. I was really afraid to pray that prayer even prior to Joel's illness and even back in our carefree life. I was afraid the Lord might not answer my earnest plea and give me what he wanted instead. That thinking is not true, it does not give witness to God's character, his person, his care for me. I think that is why I enjoy the Gospels so much, they show me Jesus interacting with people, his people and how he shows compassion to them, he helps them and meets their needs. Who am I to say that I know what is best for me or my situation. I have read many scriptures about the providence of the Lord and it has brought truth to my heart that has granted me the freedom to pray that prayer now and not be afraid. The Lord's will is the best. As I make my requests known to the Lord for the desires and longings I have, like for another blessing of fruitfulness, I do not know what the Lord has in mind, I am asking, hoping and waiting, yet now I can have a confidence that the Lord will grant what is best. As I pray for provisions, I seek, knock and ask, but now there is the ability to rest knowing he knows what we need, if we need it and when. The Lord is bringing job opportunities, I do ask the Lord to give favor and give the guys the jobs and work, and can rest assured that the ones we get are the jobs the Lord wants them to do. It is a growing and learning process, I want to continue to be able to say that prayer, but it is a dying and a laying down to myself, my ideas and it is very hard. I cannot imagine not having another baby, my thinking if the Lord does not have any more for us, why does he not remove the desire? But then that very desire is an avenue of my need for him. So sometimes what seems a cross is a blessing. How many analogies could we draw from that, a cross a blessing? I do not always stay upon the truth, there are still those times of wondering and not resting, but I have tasted this scripture and I know that is where I find the most peace and comfort. The scripture in Ps. that talks about, "it was good for me to be afflicted," I can not see the results but I believe it to be true because He is true to his word. His wisdom, his works and his ways exceed my thoughts, plans and ideas!

Busy week ahead, Lord willing! I have to go grocery shopping on Wed. because Thursday they want to go to a Farm Show in OKC and we are going to try to take our picture. Also on Wed. the 45 replacement chicks will get here. Then on Friday Bethany has to get to Ada for a goat show on Saturday.Caleb and Daniel are going to travel to Dallas with John-Clay to a filmakers meeting on Fri. evening returning on Saturday night late, Lord willing. Plus they are building a barn this week. It's funny how things change and it is great at every phase, but we used to hardly go anywhere except for music lessons and grocery shopping. I think the rush, rush started when they went to driving on their own and now with the new job, they have to go do bids and check it out, so someone seems to be going all the time.

There is a little boy that I have been praying for, he had neuroblastoma and has been on hospice for a month or so and yesterday, Sunday he went to live with Jesus. His name is Lane. I do not know them but like you prayed for Joel, I was praying for him.

Also, anyone living on Oklahoma needs to call Gov. Henry's office and encourage him to sign the senate bill 1878 into law. It has to do with the unborn. 405-521-2342

A week ahead of us...may the Lord give us grace to say nevertheless, not my will, but thine!!

Here's the donut recipe for those of you who would like to try them. :)
Homemade Franchise-Style Doughnuts


¼ cup warm water (100 to 110 F)
2 tablespoons rapid-rise yeast (I used regular)
1 ½ cups warm milk
2/3 cup sugar
1 ¼ teaspoons salt
2 large eggs
1/3 cup shortening (I used butter)
5 cups, approximately, flour
Vegetable oil or shortening, for frying

Creamy Butter Glaze

½ cup unsalted butter
2 cups confectioners’ sugar
1 ½ teaspoons vanilla extract
4 to 6 tablespoons hot water
1 ounce melted semi-sweet chocolate, melted, optional

In a mixer bowl, hand whisk water and yeast together and let stand for 2 to 3 minutes to dissolve yeast. Briskly whisk in milk, sugar, salt, and eggs and blend. Add shortening and most of flour and blend. Then knead with a dough hook on low speed only until smooth. (it is not necessary to knead this dough a long time).
Remove dough hook and spray dough lightly with non-stick cooking spray. Cover entire mixer and bowl with a large clear plastic bag. Let dough rise 50 to 60 minutes or until almost doubled.
Turn out dough onto a lightly floured surface and gently deflate. Roll to ½ in. thickness, and, using a donut cutter, cut into donuts. Cover donuts loosely with plastic wrap and let rise 20 to 40 minutes.
Heat vegetable oil in a fryer to 350 degrees. Slide in donuts, a few at a time, and fry about 1 minute per side (mine cooked a lot faster then that). Remove from oil and drain on paper towels.
For Creamy Butter Glaze, melt butter and then whisk it in a medium bowl with confectioners’ sugar, vanilla, and hot water. (I had to add more powdered sugar and water ‘cause the glaze was TOO buttery). Smear donuts in glaze.
For Chocolate Glaze, if desired, add 1 ounce of melted chocolate to one entire recipe of Creamy Butter Glaze. Smear donuts in Chocolate Glaze.


Jennifer said...

Those doughnuts look great - can you post the recipe? I would love to try them.

Anonymous said...

Mrs. Morris,

I came across your blog because you left a comment on Bring the Rain and I was attracted to the picture of your amazing family!

My condolences to all of you in the loss of precious Joel. Thank you for the beautiful emotion and faith that you have shared through your journey of grief.

The Lord has been speaking to me the last couple of days regarding where my focus and priorities are--not where they should be! Your post today was one of the ways he sent a message to me--thank you for writing!

Michelle in Iowa

Anonymous said...

Cindy, You are a lot younger than me, but you are a lot further along the way spiritually. I have ALWAYS had trouble praying 'nevertheless not MY will but THY will'. I've always been scared He would take someone dear to me if I prayed that. You are absolutely right when you say that it is NOT God's character to do that. I wonder who puts those kind of thoughts in our head. It helps me to read your blog. I love you, Ann Parker

John-Clay said...

Donut recipe.... yippeee!!!

Emma R. said...

Thanks for the donut recipe, when Emma is feeling better I will get her and Ella to help me try to make some. Emma is my recipe holder, and as you know that is the MOST important job of cooking, so she has to be well or the whole process is off. She has a really bad infection in her leg. I feel so bad for her.

You are such an inspiration to me in all you do, and in your spirtuality. Thanks so much for letting us be a part of your lives


Julia in OKC said...

The pics of the donuts looked so yummy in your last post I want to try them soon!
Thank-you for sharing your life on this blog. I really enjoy reading it and all the pictures are great too!