It does not have to be January 23 for me to re-play all that took place, the 23 rd of each month seems to hold those memories. I was especially blessed that Easter fell on the 23rd. It gave me hope in the midst of my sorrow in thinking of Joel. As I have thought about death, life and the resurrection, it has a whole new meaning. How could we continue on in this life if we did not have hope in the life to come, death will come for all. It is the passage way to real life, eternal life, living forever with the Lord and with our loved ones. Of all the difficult situations with Joel, his diagnoses, the tests, the pain he endured and the unknown, the hardest was after he took his last breath (after holding his body for sometime) having to lay the body that held Joel on the bed and to turn and walk away and leave the body that I birthed, nourished, loved on, dressed, bathed, mended the hurts on, wiped the tears from and held. There are no words to describe that feeling. That day my heart was in such turmoil, I was not looking ahead, Now as time has passed and scriptures have ministered to my heart I have hope that the little body that was battered, bruised and swollen will be raised up one day... and it all because Jesus had triumphed over sin, death and hell!!!! The resurrection is more than a story, it is my hope that I will see Joel again. It is with that hope that is before me that I can even go forward in this life. These verses are wonderful words of life and hope, they tell me what Jesus has done, they tell me of his Victory over death.
John 1:19 Jesus answered and said unto them, Destroy this temple and in three days I will raise it up.
John 11:25 Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection and the life...
Luke 14:36...nevertheless not what I will but what thou wilt
Matt. 28:6 He is not here: for he is risen, as he said...
It is because of the above verses that I can embrace these verses that I have hope to see Joel again.
John 16:22 And ye now therfore have sorrow but I will see you again
Ps. 55:18 He hath delivered my soul in peace from the battle that was against me
Ps.49:15 But God will redeem my soul from the power of the grave: for he shall recieve me
Ps. 23:6 ...and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever
Ps. 61:7 He shall abide before God forever
Ps. 73:26 My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever
It has been a day of peace in my heart as I think of what is before me, I still miss him, I missed getting him ready for church this morning, I miss him so much, but one day because of this day that we emphasize the resurrection, there is hope. There is hope everyday!!!!!
We took a family picture, we do not have all the "Easter fluff" on but I had to take it for my "records." I will tell you all about it...we told everyone to close their eyes due to bright sun and then open when you hear the beeps getting closer together... Micah did not follow instructiions:) Mercy's hair is in a dither, and Terry's tie is all lopsided and undone and if you look at me, it looks like I have my legs spread out, but its really Terry's knee!!!!Oh well, I got my picture and mama's happy about that!!!!! I wanted to share a picture at the cemetary to remind myself that Joel is not there, he is living with the Risen Lord!!!!!!
He is Risen, He is Risen Indeed!!!!!