Thursday, July 24, 2008

A Modesty Question.....

I had someone e-mail me a question. She has been reading our blog for a while and noticed that all of us girls wear skirts in the pictures, and I am always excited to answer questions of why and how we do things around here, so I wanted to share with you all the answer I gave her as you might wonder about that too. The scripture says we are to be set apart, not to be conformed to this worlds system, that we are a peculiar people, that we are strangers and pilgrims and so if we are given these titles, it seems fitting to carry these truths out in our daily lives......

Hello ********,

Thanks for asking, and yes we do wear skirts all the time. This could be lengthy so prepare yourself. I will share my testimony of this. When Terry and I married I wore jeans and shorts like most. After the boys were born and we were around families and especially this one family that was a big influence and through this family I saw a testimony of modesty. I guess the real clincher for me was the scripture in the old testament that talks about a woman not putting on man’s clothing (jeans) was what brought the conviction and that was in 1993. I shared with Terry these thoughts and that I wanted to start wearing skirts/dresses on a reg. basis’s and for our girls too, so we did. Now as the boys got older and they were around 12 years old there was another season of change, up to this point I wore t-shirts, and they were not necessarily too tight but enough to show a form or shape. I noticed that one of the twins would not make eye contact with me over a period of time and finally had a talk with him and I was being a stumbling block to him, so at that point us girls started wearing more of a blouse or button down the front shirt. For our family these changes have never hindered our abilities or caused us not to be able to perform chores or participate in sports here with our family. There are some scriptures that we base our convictions on. I will give the ref. as I am not a good typer so if you could look them up Prov.31:10-11 and Prov.5:19 this talks about not being spoiled and this was a verse that I felt backed up our ideas of wearing blouses instead of t-shirts. In Prov. 5 it talks about our husbands are the ONLY ones that are to be ravished with our breasts and if we wear tight t-shirts that show our form other men are seeing what’s behind the clothes and therefore in one sense we are getting spoiled. Other scriptures I Cor. 6:20, a principle here tells us we are not our own and to glorify God in our bodies and spirit. So to me we can say adorn our outward bodies to please the Lord for who he created us to be and to show that we are grateful for his workmanship of being a woman. Col.1:21 talks about being reconciled, that means to change thoroughly from, I am a new creature in Christ so why would I wear old garments of the old nature. You have to understand that these are principles here that can be applied to modesty. Col.3:3- talks about how we are HID with Christ in God, here we can draw a principle of how we need to be hid behind clothing that does not draw attention to parts of our bodies and like to the top with tight t-shirts or tight jeans. I Thes. 4:6. This talks about how we need not defraud another, defraud means placing desires in others that we can not rightfully fulfill. Like if we stir up other men by the way we dress, we are defrauding them. I Tim.2:9. This is a command here telling us to adorn ourselves in modest apparel. There are some who see this scripture as referring to a long flowing garment. These are some basic ones here, maybe a start for you to study and meditate upon. I hope this has not blown you away but I feel like it is the truth of scripture and as the scripture says to be a Berean and search and see if these things be so. Blessings and may the Lord grow each of us to be more like him even by our adornment. An excellent resource on this topic is Cathy Corle’s book “What in the world should I wear?”.

Cindy Morris


8 comments:

Becky said...

Thank you for this post. I started wearing all skirts/ dresses about 5 or 6 months ago. I was so glad when I found ya'lls blog. I am a country girl..a tomboy if you will.
and thought that if I wore skirts and such all the time I couldn't get done what I needed to around the ranch, but really felt that the Lord wanted me to start dressing more modestly. I have since found I can really do all the things I always have. I had never thought about the T shirts though, I do still do wear them..thank you for pointing out that they can be stumbling blocks also. Anyways, thank you. I do still get the urge to go "cowboy up" with my jeans and all, but so far I have been good at not doing that. My husband likes me wearing skirts also, but asked that I wear pants when we go out varmint hunting so I can chase down skunks and coons with him without catching my skirt on things..lol.

23total said...

I look at it as a Gift!!!!!
What a gift that is to one's Husband and Head. What a gift that is to our Lord. It is also a gift to wives as they know there husbands and sons will not be tempted. What a gift to your daughters and sons, to raise them in purity for the Lord's Glory and pure and ready for the Husband or Wife God. Praise and service to the Glory of the ALL MIGHTY GOD!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Thank you Mrs. Morris for posting about this. I know that since you spoke to me about these issues the Lord has really been working in my own life in these areas and I finally believe that the way I dress IS pleasing to the Lord and that hopefully the way I dress is not being a stumbling block to any young man.

I have noticed since wearing skirts also that besides the fact they most always are more modest that others treat you like a lady more and don't just look at you as "one of the guys" Also I do wear them for modesty issues but I also think they can set us apart from the world. We aren't to look like the world, but to be set apart. In the world but not of it and although not all skirts are modest, it's very easy for me to see a young lady in a skirt and blouse and almost always I'm right on my conclusion they are a Christian girl. :) For that reason alone I'd want to be wearing them. :) Anyway, thanks for posting the email...

AJay Piniewski said...

Hi,

I am the Dad of AJ, a 14 year old cancer victim. I wanted to make you aware (maybe again) and enlist your help for the Cure Childhood Cancer petition! The GREAT news is that CureSearch, LIVESTRONG and Alex’s Lemonade Stands have ALL written about the Petition on their websites! And TX Children’s and DUKE have both allowed us to setup paper versions inside the hospitals! WE ARE MAKING HEADWAY and are at over 11,000 signatures! But we need your help again. If you can please make your readers aware, email it around again, and give just a little publicity, I think we can make this happen!

Thanks again,
AJs Dad
http://www.thepetitionsite.com/1/CureChildhoodCancer

Leslie said...

Hi Mrs. Morris!!

I wanted to say congrads on the exciting news about the baby! I know you have desired this to happen for such a long time!!!

Oh and I am glad that you are so willing to share you a'lls standards that you personally have but I do pray that you do not judge all others who have a different standard just like I would hope that noone else would judge ya'll! Some things can be taken to far in balance and what may "seperate you from the world" may actually turn the world further away from not only yourselves but the Lord as well. The Scripture can be twisted, taken out of preportion or interpreted to fit a personal oppinion or belief.
I still say we should all be one body in Christ, no matter what!!! He loves us ALL the same!!!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for sharing the convictions that our Lord has given you in the area of modest dress!!! The Lord has been working in my heart in this area since I was 15. My family's been generally modest, by the world's standards! Yet we are not to be conformed, but transformed! When I was 15 the Lord used "Raising Maidens of Virtue" along with His Living Word (it's His Word that changed my heart) to truly capture my heart and give me a consuming passion for purity and holiness. The author queried, "How can you be sure that people automatically know you are a girl when they see you from a distance (without revealing or accentuating...)?" I knew the real answer, but I wasn't gonna say it! I eased my conscience by answering "Long hair!" So I carried on wearing my hair down more and letting it continue to grow. But the Lord is faithful and He graciously continued to refine my heart.
I'll add hear that I struggle with fearing man rather than God alone. I have no issues with being and looking different from the world! I love and delight in being "peculiar" (Titus2:14, 1Peter2:9, 2Cor6:17, Rev18:4, Is52:11, 1Pet1:16)! Throughout Christ's purifying His reflection in me I have, regretfully, feared my family's opinion. I was once shamefully among the crowd that scoffed at those with a different standard of dress than I had. I greatly regret my brazen lack of love for my brothers and sisters. I am "Ashamed to hear my mocking voice call out among the scoffers." Because I once scoffed, I know who was also in the crowd. As the Lord refines my life and chastens my heart, I am slowed by the stumbling block of fearing others opinions and shaking heads at the outward changes in me. I would greatly appreciate prayer in this area!
... the Lord continued to slowly chip away the walls of worldly thinking and standards, bit by bit. To lay a new foundation, He impressed upon me the vitality of looking distinctly feminine. He changed my standards on shorts, inch by inch, bringing me to where I only wore feminine capris. He eradicated my wearing tank tops... the last time I wore a tank in public a young man starred at me strangely and that finished it! I didn't want to cause anyone to stumble and I didn't want to be the object of someone else's sin. (Also, tanks show some underwear 95% of the time.) I strove to not wear tight (showed outline of underwear) or low shirts. Now with those, everyone can form their own opinion, and this is why we must exercise "sanctified common sense" and seek to clothe ourselves in what which will radiate purity and chastity and reflect YHWH. We must rely on the sufficiency of Scripture knowing that we have unquestionably been given "all things that pertain unto life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him that hath called us to glory and virtue..." 2Peter 1:3.
I won't go into every area of the Lord's work, but I'll say the biggest is skirts. As the Lord worked, I knew that I was to look modestly feminine. I clearly remember the first night I wore a skirt when I would've worn my loose jeans. I knew exactly what two certain members of my family would say when I walked in; and I was dead on. Cocked eyebrows, slight smirk, and here it came, "You look like a homeschooler!" There; it was out. "I am one." I replied. That was about two years ago. One day my Mom and I wore skirts to run errands, and the way people interacted with us was amazing. They smiled at us, were polite... one perfect stranger was walking out of the store as we headed in and her face became aglow when she saw us and she exclaimed, "Hello Ladies!"
I guess I should state a couple reasons why I've started wearing skirts 99.9% of the time. #1. I want to reflect the purity of a Holy God to a fallen and degenerate world. #2. I wear skirts as an act of outright rebellion against the androgyny of our culture. God created us male and female, different, and we should look it, modestly. YHWH decrees in Deut 22:5 "A woman shall not wear man's clothing nor shall a man put on a woman's clothing; for whoever does these things is an abomination to the LORD your God." For a long time I applied this verse with a "culturally relevant" twist, conviction isn't comfortable, and I squirmed. But the more I look around the more I see that this world is totally messed up and by rejecting the plain interpretation of Scripture, we are missing out on God's rich blessings! When men and woman fulfill their God ordained roles, each flourish and the joy of the Lord is poured out when we faithfully obey His Word! When men and woman act and look like Men and Women, oh! each is powerfully encouraged to grow mightily in the sphere for which God created them! I know when I wear a skirt, the men around start acting more like men, and I behave more femininely. Each begins acting out who God designed them to be. And that is beautiful and unquestionably glorifies God!
I like what you said about your wearing skirts doesn't hinder your abilities to perform chores or sports! I've found that to be true myself! Because of my fear of man's opinion :(, I don't wear skirts all of the time. When I ride etc. I wear loose jeans... I would love to wear something like what I've seen pics of Bethany in when she rides, but I fear the looks I'd get and the shaking heads. There's been one person in my life whose opinion I regard in the highest esteem. This person has been a tremendous blessing and encouragement to me as I have sought the Lord's Holy will in dress, and in many other areas! They have provided many godly insights into my dress and have provided for me a place where I can pursue whatever the Lord calls me to without any fear, but rather with joy and delight because I know this person is pleased with what pleases the Lord. I can not express what a blessing and treasure this is to me now and will be in the future.....
I am greatly touched by what the Lord showed you concerning shirts. A mutual friend shared that with me a few weeks back and the Lord has really opened my eyes to some things! In my quest for feminine attire (and the result of an overly hot dryer) some of my shirts have become more snug. I look at pictures of myself and am embarrassed to see that my underwear is defined in almost any position other than standing straight. In our day, shame is a forgotten concept. 1Tim2:9 says, "In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety..." I've been wearing blouses more of late (got a remark from a family member!) and am very aware of their modesty and how uncomfortable I feel in more fitted shirts. Now, I don't think we should wear tents, then you loose some of the grace of femininity, but there is no need for accentuating clothing. I guess it all boils down to looking in the mirror and asking the Lord to open my eyes to anything that does not reflect His purity or that draws attention to myself rather than to Him. I would greatly appreciate prayer that I would not fear man, that I will seek the Lord's will for me above all, and that I will overflow His grace toward others. Any good in me is His work so there should be no room for pride!
Sorry for the length, but it has helped me to get these thoughts out! (:Ps 89:)34,35
Oh, thought I'd mention that ya'll don't seem like a judgmental family at all! You seem very full of God's "grace and Truth."

Anonymous said...

For whatever reason, I wanted to clarify that I'm not the only one who wears skirts in our house. My Mom wears them quite often now. Don't know why but just wanted to clarify that... ?... :)

TigerLily's Gift said...

THANK YOU!!!!! What a priceless Gift to YOUR Husband and Lord.....