Friday, October 30, 2015

hard.....

Today is hard. Why? Because today, I picked up Joel's headstone for his grave. This shouldn't be happening! So much arises in my heart. Anger, sadness, heartbroken, it all will never ever escape my heart. I'm angry/so so sad that it took 8 1/2 freakin years to make this happen and not until I got a dang job. I don't care who says what, don't read any further if your judging. This is my blog and I can write what I want to. My heart is still broken that Joel died. I have yet to know why. I still have a hard time wondering where that scripture fits in "all things work together for our good." Christian people are humans with feelings and emotions and I think far to often other Christians think they shouldn't be angry or mad because it's not spiritual. There's hard days, there's days that I seem to accept and move on, but today is a hard day. I'm a mom, with a broken heart. 


1 comment:

karen said...

I've been in a hard place and I have tough questions, too. How I long to give you a hug...