I wonder if life will ever be different? I wonder if any of my dreams will come true? I absolutely have no understanding of what my purpose is everyday. I swear all I do is clean house and cook. I don't necessarily mind those things, I just want to do house projects. There are so many many broke things, I can't keep up the list. I'm griping I know. I lost something when Joel died. I lost the joy of living. I must make myself be grateful when so many have it far worse and their sufferings are much greater. Sometimes I can't figure out why so many people have to suffer and others don't. Some live their whole lives and never face anything. Right now, it seems like the Lord is far far away. And I know, it's not him, it's me. I must keep trusting and believing and hoping. I was suppose to be on a plane Friday, but plans changed, probably why I'm so down.
Enough of that. there's too much in their to tell another person anyways.
So onward with lavender cupcakes. They heal anything!