Reaping.....

To be honest I do not think I am brave or spiritual enough to say that there is anything worth it for not having Joel here with us. But if it has to be this way, which it does according to His providence, I trust Him, His infinite wisdom that all His works are righteous and good and in total agreement with His Person, that He is loving, kind, just and holy then I will look forward if He allows, opportunities of Joel's story going forth. In my flesh I reason that its not worth having over a thousand DVD's go out or to have opportunities to write here or tell others about our faith or to have sometimes 5oo visitors a day reading. I had rather have my son. But in the past few weeks the Lord has given more ways to reach out than even in the first year it seems. I am amazed of the contacts of folks from New Jersey, to Bulgaria to the upper north states that have crossed our path and have shared words of encouragement or even inquired of our faith. For so long I thought I deserved the Lord to "show" me why. With His grace I feel like I layed that to rest (not to say I'll never pick it up again) and simply sought to "trust" Him. The truth of the matter is this journey is really about the Lord and then a little 3 year old boy that was brave, that fought a battle and won, that made us laugh and cry, that will forever be in our hearts and on MY mind and now I am just getting to reap the benefits of all that he has blazed through. You see nothing is worth not having Joel here, but what the Lord is doing in and through this journey is all but amazing to my heart as of lately, and it all has to do with trusting Him instead of demanding and expecting Him to do what I think He should have done. Trust......its a vital key to reaping from the tears and sorrow. This scripture is really real now.....I am seeing the reaping and it brings such fulfillment, Ps. 126:5, They that sow in tears shall reap in joy. I want to be a faithful steward of this trial, to honor the Lord, to be an example to our children and to give to others the comfort He has given me, let it be... Lord.

The guys are working here on the farm for a few days, in between jobs. Elijah, it seems is diggin' an ocean out there in the pasture but its really just a pond!!! He and machines go well together!!! I have not talked about the other project thats been going on around here, the addition to the back of the house. It was started about a year ago and it is very slow, not due to the fact of ready and willing and capable construction workers, as they can do this project themselves, it gets worked on a resources are available. It will give us about 800 more sq. feet and it will be living space and mostly kitchen. What we want to do as quickly as possible is get the walls up and the roof on so we can accomodate our church fellowship meetings. I will be thrilled to just have more space to walk and move about in even if it does not get finished out for a while. The guys are doing the walls in the build block, thats what they do on jobs. Anyway I was super fired up that we were able to get the blocks and get the walls going up!! Bethany's baby goats did not make it, it was just too early for them. Her kidding season is right around the corner, she is very excited but it was really hard on her "farm girl" heart to have the babies die.

Pray for the Nash family as the little baby I mentioned that was born at 23 weeks, Judah, went to be with Jesus.

I once again just want to say thank you to all you out there, YOU are a blessing to me.....as I continue on this journey of tears....... yet reaping joys......


I'll try to get those two requested recipes up soon.....